As I was walking back to my Airbnb from the gym, listening to the bio of Oprah Winfrey, a thought crossed my mind,
โ๐ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ๐ฏโ๐ต ๐ด๐ฑ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐จ๐ณ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ด๐ช๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ ๐๐ฉ๐ณ๐ช๐ด๐ต๐ฎ๐ข๐ด.โ
My grandmother, a woman I adore, a woman who, has without a doubt shown what unconditional love looks like throughout my entire life, had not spoken with me in about a month.
This is also the woman that wonโt call me, I must call her. Her concern always being, โ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฎ๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ต ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ด๐บ.โ And while she knows I can always call her back, there was a point in my life where often, I didnโt.
Primarily in my mid to late 20โs, when all I could focus on was โ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฅ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฎโ, when she would call, along with other people that were important to me, I often didnโt call back. And when we would speak, I would say things like,
โ๐โ๐๐ฒ ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ป ๐๐๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐ฏ๐๐๐ ๐๐ถ๐๐ต ๐ฎ ๐ฝ๐ฟ๐ผ๐ท๐ฒ๐ฐ๐โ
โ๐โ๐๐ฒ ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ป ๐๐๐ฎ๐บ๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐๐ถ๐๐ต ๐๐ต๐ถ๐ ๐๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ป๐๐ถ๐๐ถ๐ผ๐ปโ
โ๐ช๐ต๐ฒ๐ป ๐โ๐บ ๐ป๐ผ๐ ๐๐ผ๐ฟ๐ธ๐ถ๐ป๐ด, ๐ ๐ท๐๐๐ ๐๐ฎ๐ป๐ ๐ฑ๐ผ๐๐ป ๐๐ถ๐บ๐ฒโ
[๐๐ก๐ฆ๐๐ฅ๐ง ๐๐๐ ๐ง๐๐ ๐ข๐ง๐๐๐ฅ ๐ฅ๐๐๐ฆ๐ข๐ก๐ฆ]
What amazes me most, is logically ๐ ๐๐ก๐ข๐ช how much I love this woman. How important she has been in my life, and how important she still is.
๐ฌ๐ฒ๐โฆ. ๐ ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ปโ๐ ๐๐ฒ๐ฒ๐บ ๐๐ผ ๐ฝ๐ฟ๐ถ๐ผ๐ฟ๐ถ๐๐ถ๐๐ฒ ๐ผ๐ป๐ฒ ๐ต๐ผ๐๐ฟ ๐ฎ ๐๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ธ ๐๐ผ ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐น๐น ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฟ?
Over the years I had my โ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ด๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ดโ why, that were external, and โ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ค๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ต๐ณ๐ฐ๐ญโ
BUT what was really going on wasโฆI was; worried, nervous, afraid (whatever you want to call it)โฆ.
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ ๐บ๐ถ๐๐ ๐ฎ ๐ฑ๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฑ๐น๐ถ๐ป๐ฒ
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ โ๐ฑ๐ฟ๐ผ๐ฝ ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐ฏ๐ฎ๐น๐นโ
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ๐ปโ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐ ๐บ๐ ๐ฝ๐ฟ๐ผ๐บ๐ผ๐๐ถ๐ผ๐ป
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ๐ปโ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐ ๐บ๐ ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ถ๐๐ฒ
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ๐ปโ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐ ๐ด๐ฒ๐โฆ..
๐๐๐ / ๐๐
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ ๐น๐ผ๐๐ฒ ๐บ๐ ๐ท๐ผ๐ฏ
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ ๐น๐ผ๐๐ฒ ๐ฟ๐ฒ๐๐ฝ๐ฒ๐ฐ๐ ๐ถ๐ป ๐บ๐ ๐ฐ๐ผ๐บ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐ป๐
๐ ๐๐ผ๐๐น๐ฑ ๐ฏ๐ฒ ๐๐ถ๐ฒ๐๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐ฎ ๐๐น๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ธ๐ฒ๐ฟ
As I look back, I realize how much BS is really packed away in these unspoken thoughtsโฆ
Really?
All that is going to happen if I TAKE ONE HOUR a week, to call the woman who helped raise me?
Sounds ridiculous to me now. And yet, I didnโt really become aware of this pattern until this Sunday, while I pondered on calling her.
I decided in that moment, this pattern is changingโฆ
๐ ๐ฝ๐ฎ๐๐๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐ฏ๐ถ๐ผ๐ด๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ฝ๐ต๐ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐โฆ๐๐ข๐จ๐๐ ๐ช๐๐๐ง
๐ ๐ฝ๐๐๐ต๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐ฏ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐บ๐ ๐ฎ๐ณ๐๐ฒ๐ฟ๐ป๐ผ๐ผ๐ป ๐๐ฟ๐ถ๐๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐๐ถ๐บ๐ฒ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐โฆ๐๐ข๐จ๐๐ ๐ช๐๐๐ง
๐ ๐ฝ๐๐๐ต๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐ฏ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐บ๐ ๐ผ๐๐ต๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐๐ต๐ถ๐ป๐ด๐ ๐ถ๐ป ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐ฎ๐ณ๐๐ฒ๐ฟ๐ป๐ผ๐ผ๐ป ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐โฆ ๐๐ข๐จ๐๐ ๐ช๐๐๐ง
And you know what, getting out of my head for just one hour, and having a non-rushed conversation with her, not only made my day, I still have a smile on my face, as I write this, and think about how grateful I am to have her in my life.
For those reading this, know that Iโm not opposed to focusing on success, however you may define itโฆ
BUT..SERIOUSLY
Donโt let your only life, the only time you are 30, 35, 40, and so onโฆ slip away, while the people in your life that matter do the same. Both physically from age, and literally if the relationship is all but forgotten or neglected.
For me, in the past six months, Iโve realized how much the people in my life really mean to me. And, you better believe I am going to put in the regular effort to make sure they know it.
๐๐ฒ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐๐๐ฒ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐ณ๐๐ป ๐ถ๐ ๐ฎ๐น๐น ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐๐๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฒ๐๐, ๐ถ๐ณ ๐๐ผ๐ ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ปโ๐ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ฒ ๐ถ๐ ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฑ ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐๐๐ผ๐ฟ๐ถ๐ฒ๐, ๐๐ถ๐๐ต ๐๐ต๐ผ๐๐ฒ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐๐ผ๐ ๐น๐ผ๐๐ฒ ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฑ ๐๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐น๐ผ๐๐ฒ ๐๐ผ๐?
Iโm going to continue working daily towards what I consider my north star, however, all the other stars in my life will very much be a part of my time and focus going forward.
