We spend our lives wondering.
Why am I here?
What is my purpose?
What more is there to this life?
We may walk around with this profound sense that there must be more to life than to wake, work, eat, parent, and sleep. We may be on a never ending trail of seeking. Seeking that which has not yet been found, beyond glimpses and fleeting feelings.
For the past 18 years I’ve been on a path seeking potential. For much of the time I was lost in the potential of seeking money, love, success, and reputation that could come from me reaching one peak after another. I placed false and harmful assumptions around what those could offer me, that I couldn’t offer myself.
Yet, as I’ve slowed down my thinking, and allowed the stories and narratives I’ve lived to unravel, I’ve come to see that all I’ve ever sought was to experience my own personal power.
To connect with and live from that essence I am, that is more of who I am, than experiences of powerlessness, aggression, fear, worry, and perceived limitation. All along I had been seeking myself.
Yet for so long, I looked at the mirage of money, romance, and reputation as the real goal at the end of the race. They were but an illusion. All along it’s been a journey to truly see and feel these words — “I am the solution that I am seeking”
There were many moments stretched across the years where I felt as though I am waking up to myself. I am waking up further into the real me and the real life I am meant to live.
As the fears, the worries, the rush, the blame, the hatred falls away, I feel this power within me emerge more into my life.
It’s as if the congestion from years of fearful and hindered relating along with stunted emotional growth are being washed away, released, and returned to the ether.
It is not the money we are after that offers fulfillment and a lasting sensation of completion and safety.
It is not the perfect relationship with another that offers a feeling of being whole and worthy.
It is not the pristine reputation that will have us feel our own innate value.
It’s waking to our own personal truth that we truly are the power and answer we seek.
It is alive within us.
When we feel it, we know all is well.